We’ve been in the lifestyle for about 2 years and nine months. In that time us Roses have traveled many valleys and mountain peaks. If there is any truth in this lifestyle, it is that one opts to living in the grey when one opens up. I hear a couple major reasons for being in open relationships – and particularly in the swinging lifestyle.
- “You cannot get everything you want from one partner.”
- “Sometimes, you don’t want to have a serious commitment to a partner. You just want to have fun.”
Red Rose and I are learning another reason for being in the lifestyle: It goes something like this:
“We want to honor our true, authentic selves. The lifestyle gives us a place to explore, play, and honor our untapped potentials.”
That said, we highly value each other as primary and special to each other. If something didn’t feel right between us for some reason, all other activities would cease until we could work out important issues. For me, I’ve learned that I need time to process new information. I my need a little time to accept a new relationship dynamic or lifestyle activity. After a determined amount of time, I will be able to resume activities and experiences. But, as you can see, slowing down and discussing the matter first is an important step.
One way or the other, experience seems to suggest that the dance of an open relationship is a delicate balancing act: partners are forever trying to find that ideal balance between honoring the self and honoring the relationship.
Infinity Squared = US 